Bullying can lead to feelings of depression and anxiety, and cause damage to your self-esteem.  

If you are being bullied, it's important to remember that it is not your fault, and there are lots of ways to deal with bullying. 

In this guide you will find practical guidance and advice about what bullying is, including cyberbullying, what to do if you think you are being bullied and how to stay safe. 
 

What is bullying? 

Bullying is something that hurts you on the inside or outside. This may be physical hurt if someone hits or kicks you or, more commonly, emotional pain due to name calling, teasing or being excluded socially. 

Bullying is done on purpose. Persistent name calling, teasing or being excluded socially is also bullying. This is wrong, no one has the right to hurt you physically or emotionally.
 

How bullying can make you feel 

If you are being bullied, you may feel that you don’t want to go to out. Feeling worried, sick or in pain may leave you vulnerable and scared. You may feel like you are alone in coping with the bullying and that no one is listening to you.  

However, there are people that can help and things you can do to try and improve the situation. 
 

What to do if you are being bullied 

Bullying will not go away by itself and may get worse if you try to ignore it. It can be difficult to take the first step.   

Talk to someone 

You could try and find someone that you feel comfortable talking to about what is happening to you and how it makes you feel. This could be a family member, carer, support worker, doctor, or a trusted friend. 
 

Making friends 

A good friend is a person you enjoy spending time with. It might be that you have similar interests that you enjoy talking about or that you just get on well and make each other laugh.  

Friends should be kind and offer to help each other when needed. If you are looking to make a new friend, then try looking for someone who you know is welcoming.  

You might be able to find friend by attending clubs about one of your interests. Or, you can ask someone you trust to help you find opportunities to meet new people. 
 

Bullying at work  

People tend to describe bullying in two ways: direct bullying and indirect bullying. Sometimes it can be easier to recognise if a person is bullying you directly, but even direct bullying can be hard to interpret. Examples of direct bullying could be: 

• rude remarks 
• jokes or remarks about your disability 
• insulting you in what they are saying to you or the way they are behaving towards you 
• overbearing supervision or other misuse of power or position 
• unwelcome sexual advances - this could be touching you, or standing too close to you while showing or displaying something that you find offensive 
• humiliating you in front of other colleagues 
• physical abuse. 

It can be more difficult to tell if you are being bullied if the bullying is indirect or underhand. Examples of indirect bullying can be: 

• not being put forward for training or promotion 
• persistently criticising your performance 
• setting you tasks or deadlines that you are never going to be able to meet 
• leaving you out or not inviting you to team social events 
• spreading malicious rumours about you 
• making when your performance at work has been fine; for example, saying that the last person who did your job was fired for not doing the job correctly 

Bullying might not just be done face-to-face - it could happen in emails or other written documents to you, over the phone, or by being unfairly monitored for something when none of your colleagues are being singled out for the same kind of treatment. This means you are being supervised in a way that no-one else is, so you are being treated differently.
 

What the law says about the role of your employer 

Bullying it not against the law but employers do have a duty of care to you while you are at work. Also, you can make complaints under laws covering discrimination and harassment. 

One of the main laws we'll look at here is the Equality Act 2010. However, it's important to remember that you could be bullied for reasons other than your disability; for example, because of your race or sex, or just because someone doesn't like you. 

The employer's duty of care means taking action to deal with the problem if there is bullying at work. Under the Health and Safety at Work Act 1974 employers have a duty to ensure the health, safety and welfare of their employees and if they do not keep to this they are in breach of the Health and Safety at Work Act.
 

Equality Act 2010 and Northern Ireland Disability Act 

If you live in England, Scotland or Wales and decide to tell your employer about your diagnosis, you are protected by the Equality Act 2010. The Equality Act requires public bodies to promote equality of opportunity for disabled people, and there is a whole section of the Equality Act on employment. 

Being protected by the Equality Act means you should be treated equally and fairly in the workplace, and should not be discriminated against on the grounds of your disability. It also means that your employer should make reasonable adjustments to help you at work. 

Similarly, in Northern Ireland you are covered by the Northern Ireland Disability Discrimination Act. 
 

Cyber and other forms of bullying 

Cyberbullying is now common due to a wide use of technology. 

If you get unwanted or nasty texts, emails or social media messages, then you should talk to someone you trust about it, as you would with any other bullying incident.
  

Further links and resources 

• Visit Bullying UK for practical information and advice including dealing with cyberbullying 
• Visit Mencap and read real-life bullying stories